Indiana Jones and the Mystery of the Budweiser Bikini

I know much of the ways of men. I am living with one who gives me way too much insight at times (would it kill you to close the door while you pee?). However, there are some things that remain elusive to me. Such as why Budweiser bikini's are attractive to guys. I spent good, decent money on a push-me-up, keep-it-in bikini to make me look like a svelte and sleekly well-proportioned beach goddess, and he wonders why I didn't get a "sexy" bikini. Like a Budweiser bikini. I thought only biker chicks wore those.

Seriously, to placate him, I went to Bikini Village, where they keep them at the back away from all of the designer suits (as if those beautiful Shan suits will be corrupted by the white-trash tankinis) and tried one on. It barely covered my boobs, and less said for what was posing as a bikini bottom the better. I could have swallowed the entire suit without a glass of water to help it on it's way. And I'm no prude! I draw the line at beach thongs, but other than that, most anything goes. But I looked like a ring girl at a junior kickboxing competition, or the girlfriend of someone called "Snake".

So, after my "dance" class (more on that in the following post) I went next door to a lovely boutique called Lovecraft, just for a browse. I came across Budweiser bikinis in the sale section (at a SEX SHOP...the pheneomena must be more widespread than I initially thought!) So I tried one on, figured, what the hell and bought it for him. Not for me, I wouldn't be seen dead with it on out of the house, but I figured I'd spend the same on lingerie.

So, he's in for the shock of his life tonight, his own Bud Girl. I shall inform you of the reaction...let's just call it a social experiment.